chug along and the fish plates will become ur shock absorbers....

Local train journey-agony or blessing in disguise???

T minus 10..9..8..7..6 *gulp*…5..4..3..2..1 “aey kai kartos re??…aat madhe zaaa ataa!!” Hey there what are you doing? Get inside quickly! plus a few unmentionable adjectives and in I go, and probably a few minutes later out I come, in the same fashion!
No, this isn’t a police round-up and I am certainly not a criminal! This is what several other Mumbaikars like myself get to hear every friggin day while getting in and out of one of the two lifelines of Mumbai-local trains (the other being the BEST bus service)! Well most of you who are from Mumbai, and commute by local trains are no exception to the verbal abuse (yeah, that’s what it is) and the physical torture (which would put the Indian Army’s physical training to shame)! I mean, who needs to go to the gym if one can get free training for any sport event by getting in and out of the local trains, during the peak hours! You think otherwise? Then here are some of the few points that I would like to put forward, which would force you to think my way:
1. One has to literally save oneself from getting punched at (Boxing)
2. One needs to jostle through the crowd with all possible gifted might (Boxing yet again)
3. One has to run from the staircase to the compartment with the fastest possible pace in a few seconds (Athletics)
And a lot more other events which I am sure each commuter can come up with! I mean, look at this, you get to exercise every muscle in your body without even paying those hefty fees! The work gets done in a few double-digit (sometimes even single-digit) bucks! And if this wasn’t enough, sometimes you even get your body massaged (included in the ticket charge)!!!! Where else can you get such value-for-money service?!! One even gets to perform gymnastics in a 2*2 units of space (I suck at metric units, so go figure that out yourself)! I am sure every second Mumbaikar who commutes by train would agree with me when I say that we can beat the best of Russian gymnasts at any gymnastic event held anywhere in the world! I am sure that we all have managed to amaze ourselves when we stood on one leg, the head tilted in the most impossible way with both our hands spread 3 feet apart, holding on to those handles for support, be it for mental or physical! And did I forget to mention that one becomes a true fighter (literal sense of the word)! Even the meekest of the individual transforms into a mean ‘push n punch’ machine!!! You look around yourself, that is if you get the opportunity to move your head sideways, and you see all sorts of people-from baajoowalein Sharma uncle to doorwaalein Vitthalrao uncle, from the ‘metrosexual’(bah! whoever came up with that word) Rahul to the not so dashing wanabe Jignes; from all sorts of backgrounds foul mouthing, punching or doing nothing but giving you the ‘look’! *uffff*
There are a few things that happen much to our chagrin. Like, free supply (or no supply) of cologne(cheap quality ones-if you know what I mean), body parts rubbing against each other (aaaargh), people sweating bullets and if you don’t you feel left out! If the weather wasn’t enough the hot air gushing out of a 100 standing bodies at the same time! Talk of artificial loo (hot summer winds for the uninitiated)! And to add to the misery, some female commuter gets into the already crowded general compartment! I don’t mean to say that they shouldn’t but then to give them way, 5 already bummed guys move as far as away so that they don’t get slapped or verbally abused at and in the process, all of us get pushed and then the verbal melodrama starts!
But every coin has two sides. So much so for the not so positive aspects of commuting by local trains, its time to highlight the positive ones. Don’t you think that it’s the best place to observe people? Their behavior, their antics, their tolerance level, what they say, what they wear and a lot more! Like I mentioned before, people from all sections of the society travel together, under one moving roof. No one really cares where you come from or where you are heading to. In a country like ours where there is rampant caste discrimination, inside that stuffed compartment, people from various castes come together, stand together, feel each other’s breathe and most of the times exchange words even- be them parliamentary or the not so parliamentary ones! People take care to see that all of them are safe, that no one is hanging by the door (though that happens a lot), that everyone gets to alight at their desired destination by giving way for them to pass through the crowd. Its like, in the real true sense of the phrase “Unity in Diversity”. It’s the interaction that takes place, that makes or teaches people to be more tolerant. People get to know each other, they exchange thoughts, recipes(for food or for success), sing songs in chorus, share jokes, laugh together, make new friends and a lot more. And for small time writers like me, a good source of inspiration! And last but not the least, we learn to listen for if we don’t we sure do know the dire consequences. In a way, it becomes a sort of disciplinary school for each one of us. It teaches us to be humble at any given point of time, no matter how tired we are, how rich we are, how important we are or how snobbish we are! Like I have always said, one can never know the city one lives in if one doesn’t commute by public transport, for a city is made up of its people and not its high rise buildings and fast moving cars.
Signing of for now.
Arohi “local train commuter” Chakraborty